Why I Dance

why-i-danceNot to be taken literally. I was blessed with two left feet and must have skipped the line when rhythm was being doled out. But now I DANCE, figuratively of course. Let me explain. I grew up in a one horse town. No. Literally. There was one horse. The Schaffer's farm, I walked there every Sunday. It was a beautiful white stallion with a golden brown mane. I am not sure why they called it a farm, I mean, they only had one horse. I also don't know why they called him Shadow, he was white, talk about irony. Anyhow, that's beside the point. I was confined in the walls of a Roman Catholic High School. Great for education, not so great for a young adult realizing who they are and that they didn't fall in line with what the Theology class they sat through every......single....day..... taught them. I was not lost in figuring out who I was. I was confident about that. I found myself longing for a sense of community. GSA club? No way. LGBT Youth Groups? Not in this town.

Don't get me wrong. The people I surrounded myself by were fantastic beyond words but I still felt misunderstood and was craving just one conversation or one place I could go where those standing beside me had an understanding of what this was like or felt like I did. It was a critical part of what I was missing.

Throughout the next 15 years I went to clubs, met with other LGBT individuals in chat rooms >>oh AOL, sigh<< and fortunately for me, my closest friend in high school came out in college. Not without challenge but I found my community, I found those who could relate and at times I had a lot of fun doing it. But the clubs weren't my scene, ever. The Internet, well that's dangerous. Now my best friend, that poor sap is stuck with me for the rest of his life. It came together and I have no complaints, I wouldn't change a thing, not for myself anyway. But now, now I dance.

When I found the group LGBTea Dances, before it even was LGBTea Dances, I found community once again. When this group shifted its focus into a nonprofit I saw an opportunity to make a difference, simply by showing up. This group is making an impact in my area, just outside of my little one horse town. They are doing this not just by holding events where I can go to be a part of that community but by supporting causes that will help youth in the area to find information, support for their local clubs and groups and find that community that I was missing when I was young.

I don't dance just because I can, because well, I can't. I don't dance because it's something to do or somewhere to go. I dance for that kid. That kid who sits beside a fence at a farm every Sunday morning, in their small conservative one horse town, just longing for a sense of community. That my friends, that is why I dance.

NewsCarrie Pizzillo-Stare